Imagine being so out of shape you can’t even dispose of a body.

Cuba, Greenland and now this? Dude we cannot allow Trump to find out about Australia.

I’m of the opinion that if you cave dive, you forfit body recovery. Your corpse isn’t worth the lives to go get it. You made the dumbass decision to go cave diving, you can live with the consequences. Your family can slap a picture of you in coffen if that’s what needs to happen. Just stop killing rescue personnel because you thought you were special enough to live.

So when poeple were working from home after covid we HAD to get them back in the office because bussiness was being hurt by office workers not spending their lunch money, but when it’s the president’s Not So Secret police it’s totally fine. Got it.

Damn. I wish there was a way for them to sterilize the body and then hand it over to relatives. However, I’m sure just drowning the corpse in bleach first is just not an option for many reasons. What a mess.

I read this article and immediately went to thank my husband for not drugging, raping and filming me. He was like uh, you’re welcome? Figured not drugging your loved ones was one of those unwritten rules, but I guess not.

Godamn I think I need a flowchart or something. There’s no thread of logic holding any of this together. Of course he changed his mind and did some dumbass shit again. I have lost the plot somewhere.

Watching the robot cheerfully veer into the glass panel like a drunk on a lawn mower absolutely sent me. My sides.

I don’t want to have a nuclear war, my new birdfeeder is coming tomorrow.

And my axe!